I’ve never lived in a brick house, although for some reason I’ve always wanted to. There’s just something about brick that makes a house seem more real. A brick house just looks like something that is not going anywhere. Kind of the opposite of a towable home, like those made by Forest River or the modular homes made by Clayton Homes. When I do finally one day settle into a brick house, there’s a very good chance those bricks will have been made by the Acme Brick Company. It sounds fake because of the Acme name’s use in cartoons, but in fact Acme is one of America’s oldest brick companies, founded in 1852. I really don’t like the look of painted bricks, but on the interior a few coats of Benjamin Moore paints would be nice.
Speaking of the interior, I’ll need to furnish this new brick house. Chrissy and I once rented every piece of furniture we had from Cort Furniture. That was fine at the time, but this time we’ll need to buy. I’m not sure where this house will be yet, so I don’t know if we’ll be near a Jordan’s Furniture, Nebraska Furniture Mart, Star Furniture, or an RC Willey Home Furnishings outlet. We’ll need a dresser in our bedroom to hold our Fruit of the Looms and BVDs. But unless we have kids we won’t need any place to keep Underoos or Garanimals.
We’ll also need some flooring. Shaw can provide us with carpeting and hardwood floors. And we might as well keep those carpets clean with a Kirby vacuum.
In the garage I’ll finally get that air compressor I’ve been wanting. A Campbell Hausfeld should do. As long we there’s enough room to keep our cars. Does Geico give a discount if your cars are garage kept?
In the kitchen it might be funny to have some Ginsu Knives. Those things are practically indestructible, if the infomercials are to be believed. And what foodie’s kitchen would be complete without some Pampered Chef gadgets? But all this house building is making me too tired to cook. I’d rather just drive through a Dairy Queen.
To finish off the house we should throw a set of encyclopedias on the shelf. I grew up with a set of World Books.
Chrissy recently asked me if I was interested in getting a pilot’s license. I suppose, some day. Maybe I’ll sign up for classes with FlightSafety. If not, maybe we’ll just become partial owners of a NetJet. And if we have that much money, maybe Chrissy would like to celebrate our new home with some Helzberg Diamonds. Me, I’d rather just get some new shoes, like a pair of Dexters.
So apparently in this little dream world we have a lot money, but not as much of Warren Buffett, largest shareholder and CEO of Berkshire Hathaway, the company that owns every product I’ve mentioned and whole bunch more.